The new trailer for the "Sex and the City" movie--due out on May 30th-- came and went faster than one of Samantha's romps. It was leaked late last night and New Line yanked it by noon.

But if you awoke early this morn -- like the Rage -- you saw it and learned:

1. Carries claims that she doesn't want a big diamond from Big. "I just want a big closet," she says. She's totally lying and the girls will have to call an emergency brunch when he gives her a measly half-carat Princess cut.

2. Samantha loves botox, but hates marriage. I predict that she'll get vaginal rejuvenation in the movie and then try to show the girls her new "accessory" (under the table) at above mentioned brunch date.

3. Charlotte is pregnant. Um, didn't Jennifer Lopez just do that in real life? Boring.

4. Miranda will...aw, nobody cares about Miranda. (Though she was always my favorite for her dry wit and fondness for pantsuits.)
watch it